Secrets of Us A Forbidden Love Romance (Alina)

Chapter 136

Breathe

It takesa good hour to calm down, to stop the sobbing and to dry my face.

There's no hiding the fact that | was crying, though, and the fact that I'll have to explain that to Jake and Aiden

makes my stomach turn.

We head back downstairs, Zaid's hand in mine and my coffee in his other hand.

Jake does a double take from where he's making breakfast, his eyes turning angry. "What'd

he do?"

Zaid shakes his head with a scoff.

| make my way to Jake and plant a kiss on his cheek. "Nothing, | promise."

He looks unsure and when | turn to meet Aiden's eyes as he chops fruit; | find him frowning between Zaid and I.

He doesn't askanything, so the four of us make breakfast together silently. Zaid

makes new coffee and servesa fresh, warm mug.

Over breakfast, Jake's sharp gaze lingers onlonger than usual, and Aiden nudges my

shoulder as we wash the dishes together.

"What's up with you?" Aiden asks, his voice light. "You've been quiet. You were crying."

| force a small smile. "I'm fine. I'm just tired."

He nods, but there's a hesitancy to whether he believesor not.

Jake leans against the counter, arms crossed, eyes scanninglike he's trying to figure out what I'm not saying.

"Maybe you need a break from us. You've been spending the night, with one of us every night."

"Yeah, for like two weeks," Aiden adds.

| hum in agreement. It's because they keep the thoughts away, the nightmares and the tears away.

"You're probably exhausted," Jake whispers, running his hand down my arm.

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Breathe

Zaid, though, he doesn't say anything. He just watcheswith those dark, unreadable

eyes.

The hours pass and we go grocery shopping in the afternoon. The four of us pile into Jake's car, and | let myself

get caught up in the normalcy of it all.

The bickering over which brand of pasta sauce to get, Aiden throwing random snacks into the cart, Jake scolding

him like he's a child, and Zaid staying quiet but never straying too

far from me.

| feel the warmth of his hand brush against mine more than once, feel the way his fingers graze my lower back

when we stop to grab something from the shelves. Every t| look at him, his gaze is already on me, and when

| catch it, he just leans in slightly, whispering kisses across my cheeks.

He doesn't push. Doesn't ask. Just remindshe's there.

I don't know how to thank him for that.

By the tdinner rolls around, the mood is lighter. The four of us cook together, and for a little while,

everything feels normal again. The tension insideeases, if only for a

little while.

| almost forget.

After dinner, | make cookies, and Aiden turns on the music while we wait for them to bake. He grabs my hand,

spinningaround in the kitchen, makinglaugh as he moves tically to the beat.

He shoves his hips against mine, and I'm laughing so much my stomach hurts.

Jake sits at the table, watching with an amused smile.

Zaid, however, remains quiet. His expression unreadable, his focus entirely on

me.

Even as | twirl in Aiden's arms, | feel Zaid's gaze on me. He hasn't pushed, hasn't brought up our conversation

from earlier, but he hasn't letout of his sight either. It should

makefeel suffocated, but it doesn't. It makesfeel safe.

It makesfeel seen.

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Breathe

As I'm wiping down the countertop, Jake steps behind me, wrapping his arms

around my waist. "You know we have people that do that."

I chuckle. "Clean?"

He nods against my shoulder.

| shrug. "I don't mind. It helpsclear my head."

He grabs the rag from my hand and tosses it in the sink. He spinsin his arms,

makingface him. "I can help you clear your mind."

He kissesdeeply. His tongue explores my mouth as he holdsclose. When we pull

apart, I'm panting. My eyes drift over his shoulder where Zaid and Aiden are walking in.

| smile softly, placing my hands on Jake's shoulders. "I think I'll sleep alone in my

room

tonight."

Aiden crinkles his nose, but since | was with him last night, it doesn't bother him much. "Fine. But I'm going out

with Parker tonight."

"Don't be out too late," Jake says. He letsgo, letting Aiden kissgoodbye.

As Aiden walks away, Jake takesback in his arms. He tucks my hair behind my ears and kissessoftly.

Gentle. "Goodnight, baby."

| give him a peck and then it's just Zaid and I.

He hesitates. His lips press together, his jaw tensing like he's physically stopping himself

from saying something. | see the conflict in his eyes, the urge to askif I'm really okay, to push just a little, to

remindthat he knows I'm not fine.

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Instead, he leans in, kissing my forehead. "Goodnight."

| swallow the lump in my throat. "Goodnight."

| go to my room, climb into bed, and stare at the ceiling. The room feels too big. Too quiet. Too cold.

| turn onto my side. Then my other side. | toss and turn, my stomach twisting. My chest aches, the weight of

everything pressing down on me. | squeeze my eyes shut, trying to

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4:08 pm

Breathe

will away the memories, the guilt, the endless loop of it's my fault that keeps

playing in my head.

Every t| close my eyes, | feel like I'm suffocating.

I can't do this.

Before | even think it through, I throw off the blankets and slip out of my room. My

feet move on their own, my body already knowing where | need to be.

Zaid's door is closed, but | don't hesitate. | open it quietly and step inside.

He's awake. Sitting up against the headboard, his phone in his hand, but the second he sees me, he puts it

down.

Neither of us says a word.

I don't have to ask. He doesn't have to offer.

1 walk to his bed, and he lifts the blanket forwithout hesitation. I climb in

beside him, pressing my face against his chest as his arms wrap around me.

| finally breathe.

Chapter 136

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